Jasper's life
by Xx.Panic and Chaos.xX
Summary: jasper before he meets the cullens and his struggle with his new life
1. Chapter 1

**Jasper's life **

**Chapter 1: the start and the change **

I was a respected person in the military I followed orders as well as I gave them which got me to high places. I was assigned in Galveston in charge of helping the women and children out of the cities and villages to safety while the war was on. I was on my horse at the back of the crowed making sure we didn't lose anyone.

We had finally gotten everyone to the camp and I was making sure that all was well, when in the distance I could see three figures in the distance I had no idea how they had been left behind but seeing as I was about to ride back into Galveston anyway I decided to help them on their way. I rode out to them and unmounted my horse to greet them and make sure they were ok.

"Hello good sir" one of the three girls that stood in front of me they were so beautiful so delicate, but something was wrong very wrong. Their very presents made the hair on the back of his neck stand on ends, and yet I could not turn away because I thought that they were my duty.

"Hello ma'am" I replied politely "what is your name sir?" she asked smiling at me with red eyes that sent chills down my spine "Major Jasper Ma'am" I said just barely keeping my voice from showing my fear.

"I think I like him" said one of the three girls "I think I agree with you, but the question remains who will do it?'' one of the other two said to the first girl "I will Nettie, I won't kill him, I promise'' the last girl smiled to the one called Nettie."Ok Maria" she nodded

I stood there confused. What did they mean? Before I knew it Nettie and one of the girls who name was still unknown where gone. Maria stood in front of me smiling "This will hurt just a bit Major Jasper'' she smirked

I took a step back and she lunged at me pinning me to the ground. My feeble struggles did nothing to her iron grip. I tried to yell for help but she put her ice cold pale hand over my mouth. She pushed my head to the side so I was looking away from her. She licked the column of my neck and giggled.

She bit into my neck I felt her teeth sink into my flesh. It hurt the pain started to spread. My screams muffled by her hand. It felt like hot lava was in my veins, my body arched in pain my breath faltered catching in my throat. I felt her pull back, but the pain continued to spread getting worse. She stood up but before I could scream darkness took me.

I woke up in a small dark room, I don't know how long I was out but I still hurt so much I started to scream and my body arching and thrashing unwillingly. "PLEASE MAKE IT STOP" I yelled over and over again begging for it to end but no one seemed hear my pitiful shrieks for mercy.

After a few days the pain started to recede staring from my fingers and toes slowly working its way back to my chest till only my heart felt like it was on fire. My heart thudded inside my chest getting faster and faster my breath becoming erratic along with my pulse and then my heart gave out but I didn't die like I was supposed to. I blacked out for what seemed like a second, I reopened my eyes to see Maria.


	2. Chapter 2

**Jasper's Life**

**Chapter 2: A new life**

Oh my god it was like waking up with a god awful headache. I could hear everything and everything was so bright and clear, it made my head hurt.

Maria explained what I was; she told me that I was a vampire at first I just stared at her like she was a crazy person but the more she told me and showed me the more I realised she wasn't crazy (well at least to some degree) and that this was not some cruel joke.

She showed me around the camp. I met many newborns like myself. I discovered that I had an extra ability. I had the ability to sense other people's emotions and control them; this seemed to make Maria very happy because it meant that I could make her newborn army more efficient and make our enemy more vulnerable.

After weeks of training and looking at different tactics we were sent out to meet our first lot opposing army of newborns. Everyone seemed so scared it made it much more difficult to make them calm but I managed. We ran at them and they ran at us. We were doing well I was keeping our newborns focused the enemy newborns were in almost total chaos and just seemed to attack anything that moved.

One of the newborns came out of nowhere and pinned me to the ground and started to bite me ripping and tearing at my granite like flesh. I somehow managed to throw him off me, not stopping to think about how I had thrown him off I tore him limb from limb with such ferocity I scared myself, but for now I didn't worry because I was already facing my next opponent.

The massacre went on for days but in the end we won, but our numbers were low. So Maria organised with her sisters to make more newborns, It didn't seem to take them long, within weeks the camp was once again full of more newborns.

Many more battles raged and I obtained more and more bite mark scars, but I gave as many as I had received.

Years went by and still we kept fighting and unlike most of the other newborns Maria kept me she seemed to like me. But even with my help Maria and her sisters fell apart and they left they didn't want total control of the area anymore, but then again they were never as power hungry as Maria, so they left to become nomads where as Maria kept going getting greedy.

She had put me in control of a small troop of newborns and we were used to take out the smaller covens of the area I never really like this task but did it anyway and she had also assigned me and a vampire named Garret who had escaped the one year termination like myself, in exterminating the year old newborns they were of no use to her anymore so they had to go, neither of us liked doing this but like getting rid of the small covens I did it anyway.

More years went by and I was getting bored of power hungry Maria and the constant fighting, but I had nowhere else to go so I stayed.

One night when Garret and I were getting rid of the yearlings something seemed off I could feel he was anxious, but I ignored it. We where half way through the yearlings when a woman who looked about 20 walked in, her name was Charlotte, I was about to kill her when Garret grabbed her arm and started yelling for her to run.

He and Charlotte ran off into the night. I didn't bother to tell Maria I personally wanted to join him I don't know why I didn't follow him when I had the chance.

Maria seemed to be going insane with greed and power and I wanted out, but still I stayed.

About a year later Garret and Charlotte returned with an offer for me to join them I agreed almost instantly. I left anything I owned at the camp I didn't want to have any reminders of it with me and with that I left with them.

Two weeks later I received word that Maria's reign was over without my power everything turned to chaos and anarchy. Served her right I thought to myself when I heard the news.

I was happy to be free, but I still wasn't happy something was still nagging at the back of my mind and each day it grew worse.

**Please review xoxoxo **

**also I don't own twilight and I'm sorry if it is too close to the breif story that he gave in the book but I have to stick to it to some degree**


	3. Chapter 3

**Jasper's Life**

**Chapter 3: finally free **

I was out finally free of Maria and better yet her dream of power had left with me, I should feel happy, why do I feel horrible? Why do I still suffer?

Garrett, Charlotte and I continued on our way we were currently making our way to the north we were sick of the fighting in the south.

But no matter how far I went I could not escape my power and the need to feed, sadly they were a bad mix a very bad mix. This was the cause of my suffering. No matter what horrible stuff I had done I was still a man of compassion and it was unbearable to feel the pain and sheer terror of my unfortunate victim. Even though they are dead and gone I can still hear their begs for mercy, for their lives, their shrieks still ring in my ears.

I cannot escape death, I try but death follows me no matter where I go or what I do. I was never taught to control my thirst the burning in my throat is unbearable and I was always taught when you were hungry go feed end of story because we were at the camp to fight not feed , so even though I am no longer a newborn I have a new bourns control over my unquenchable thirst for blood.

So now I stalk my next victim, a young man looks about 25, tall and muscular with short black hair and blue eyes. ''I'm sorry'' I whisper and lunge at him. I drain him as quick as possible trying not think about who's son, father, brother, uncle or friend I had just stolen and what I made him leave behind, but I still managed to feel his terror, pain and longing for his family to be ok after he is gone.

I sighed and buried the body on the out skirts of town. After that I went to find my companions who had finished their meal as I arrived.

We continued on our way slowly heading north. And with each passing day, with each kill I made the more I hated myself and the more I wanted to die.

I can't take it anymore. I had to get away. While my companions were out hunting I left I just simply left. I ran and ran never stoping not even to feed. I had nothing left nothing to live for and a hell of a reason to die.

My only way out was suicide so that is what I will do... but how?


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 3 suicide and pixies **

I stood at the edge of a cliff staring at the horizon I felt the wind ruffle my hair softly I shut my eyes as I prepared to fall. I opened my eyes and looked down and the waves as the crashed against the cliff and the sharp rocks below, foaming like rabid dogs. I took a deep breath and let myself fall I wasn't scared as I plummeted to the ground I had no fear I was glad that I would no longer be a burden to this earth.

BANG. I hit the rocks. I lay here perfectly fine "YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME'' I yelled looking around. I looked around "the rocks are broken" I laughed hysterically repeating it over and over again my sanity was gone for weeks after that. I tried so many ways it wasn't even funny.

I stabbed myself, the knife just got mangled didn't even pierce the skin. I tried walking in front of a car, it didn't even make me budge it just got all fucked up and did a flip over me. The list goes on and on. Every time I tried and failed I lost even more of my grip on reality and my sanity.

With the last piece of sanity I had left I decided to try one last time. I was going to starve myself...

*2 weeks later*

I was lying on the forest floor weak and hungry my throat burned I just prayed that a hunter didn't decide to come to this part of the woods even though I was too weak to move I know that if a hunter was to come past now I would have no second thought of killing them not because I'm a cold blooded killed, mainly because my instincts would take hold.

I felt something poking my leg. I inhaled deeply it was an animal it didn't smell as appealing as a human but it was enough to make me lose control I sprang onto the unsuspecting creature which turned out to be a deer. I drained it and let the carcass fall to the ground and I felt oddly satisfied and I realised that I felt barely anything from the deer I realised that animals although have emotion they did not have the same emotional depth as humans so they didn't affect me a smile spread across my face I had found a solution to my problem. "Why did I not think of this before, stupid Jasper stupid, stupid, stupid'' I muttered smacking myself in the face.

I sighed and shrugged and started to run. I ran for a few days slowing down if I liked an area if I liked it even staying in places for a few weeks learning to control my urge to kill any human that I could get my hands on it was a very slow process so I tended to stay away from towns.

I decided to go into a small town after about a month of running nonstop mainly coz I felt like getting out of the rain for once. I refused to talk to anyone or make eye contact. I found a nice little diner an went inside I had only taken 3 steps when this enthusiastic little pixie type girl came bounding up to me ''geez keep me waiting will you?'' she said crossly with a happy enthusiastic undertone

''sorry ma'am'' I said politely and nodded slightly is greeting and she smiled at me

_Heeyyy sorry if my story id lame but hey it's my first time so be nice and this one will end soon btw. So pretty plz review so I know what to improve on and what is good ect ect also if u have any story ideas for me I would be forever grateful coz I can't think of anything 4 my next story anyways thanx and I don't own twilight just so ya no hahahaha xx _


End file.
